Saturday, 22 August 2015

Meteos Memory Review

Last night at stupid o' clock I posted the latest memory review for the lovely Meteos on Wordpress. Those who played the game may remember it came out in two thousand and five, a whole four years before Little King's Story. This did not occur to me until this morning however. In the latest in a long line of screw ups I completely messed up the review order and in the fact the next two reviews (Skyward Sword and Wii Sports Resort most likely) should have come before Little King's Story.
Please excuse my uselessness,
The other one

Thursday, 13 August 2015

Little King's Story ~ Memory Review

After a number of delays the latest Memory Review (which I deeply regret not calling "From Memory" but here we are) is up on Wordpress. It's a review of the lovely Little King's Story for the Wii and there's some thoughts on Psychonauts and an amateurish attempt at a discussion of how one should review a game (what an endorsement eh? Believe it or not this review was delayed because I was working in sales for a while).
Since it's been a while, the running gimmick (or one of them at least) of quotes from Miister X about the games may have been forgotten (oh the irony). So here's a refresher on the statements that an intern assures me he "got when [he] contacted Miister X about the games".
Paper Mario Sticker Star: "As my client, Miister X made clear when he signed our deal with you, you may use his likeness for a fee, but he wants "nothing to do with your damn blog". He went on to say that he doesn't know what a sticker star is but that if you attempt to obtain another free opinion from him he will "shove a packet of match attack stickers so far down your throat that your intestines will look like a Man U fan's bedroom wall" Please don't call this number again unless you are in a position to make a cash offer. [Dictated but not read]"
Pilotwings Resort: "I believe I made it clear in my last message not to call this agency again unless you're interested in entering into another financial arrangement with Miister X or one of my other clients. You're phone number will now been blocked. Uh. Johnathon, how do hang up, wait no I have"

Monday, 10 August 2015

Psychonauts Hoedown

Only the finest PowerPoint enabled graphics for you Sporadic Reader

I posted the lyrics to a "Whose Line Is It Anyway" style hoedown over on Wordpress because why the hell not? While those guys come up with them on the spot, mine took all day and even I'm not sure how some of it is supposed to go. On a serious note I think it turned out OK and might post more of this kind of nonsense in the future, I've already got the beginnings of ode to Gunpoint à la Tom Jones rattling around in my head. I put it on Wordpress because lately I've been thinking that maybe it's a better fit for what I post which could hardly be called a blog. What does this mean for the Psychonauts review? Hard to say. Through the medium of song I conveyed most of the key points I would have made and it's a well covered game to begin with so unless I find myself with a lot of time to spare I don't really see the value in a full review.

Thursday, 6 August 2015


Some of you1 may have noticed that my plans for a weekly Memory Review2 are starting to seem like a cruel joke. Well there's a few reasons for that. For a few weeks I had a very time consuming job so I barely had time eat and replenish my helium supplies, let alone write a review. When I finished there I found that the game I had planned to review was a tricky one to discuss without simply listing features (WarioWare DIY if you're curious) so I decided to skip that one for now, that cost another few days. The next game on my list was Little King's Story, a game that I'm very fond of and that I have a lot of things to say about, in fact one of those points may well be spun into a separate article. While I was considering all this and writing the review draft, my laptop crashed and only after a week did I find out that there was no way of recovering the files. As well as the LKS draft I lost my notes on a lot of games I'd played recently (Psychonauts, Gunpoint etc.) as well as the most recent copy of my "big pile of ideas" file so future pieces are probably going to take (even) longer to put together, at least for a little while. Thanks for your patience.

1: Let's be honest here. There are none of "you". I'm writing only because I mentioned this blog on a CV and it wouldn't look good to the hiring manager if they looked it up and found that I hadn't kept to a schedule. Incidentally, hello.
2: That name is not getting any catchier is it?